It's hard looking after a new baby - but many parents believe it just gets tougher as they get older.

Research has found that more than half of parents (52%) find looking after a teenager harder than a newborn, and 60% worry more about their teenager than they did when the child was a baby.

The survey of 1,000 parents by the National Citizen Service (NCS), suggests part of what makes parenting a teenager so hard is the stark contrast between a baby's dependence on them and a teen's independence. Indeed, 58% of the parents questioned admitted they were worried their teenagers' future was out of their hands, and 45% felt they had no influence over their teen's decisions.

Teenage parenting expert Sarah Newton, a mother of two teenage girls, suggests that when children are young the hard part is physically always having to be there, but when they're teenagers, while parents don't always have to be physically present any more, their children need support, which can be mentally exhausting.

"They don't need you around so much, but mentally they become more difficult," she says.

"You worry about them more - have they done their homework, how will they do in their GCSEs, what university will they go to? It's the amount of head space they take up which is different."

Newton, who has written books about teenagers and coaches them, points out that with younger children there are milestones that parents can measure their children's development against, but as kids get older, there's nothing to measure them by, except perhaps exam results, which are far from the whole picture.

"Parents don't tend to talk about the challenges they're facing with teenagers, because they feel like they're failing, but there's nobody to guide you and tell you your child's fine."

Newton suggests that while parents teach younger children, and manage pre-teens, they need to lead teenagers.

"Parents panic and they try to micro-manage their child instead of leading them.

"Ask questions rather than giving them advice - it's a really subtle shift, and very difficult to do."

Such a shift can include parents letting their children make mistakes, and Newton says she even had to let her daughter fail a maths exam for her to figure out that she needed to try harder.

"It's difficult," she says. "Many parents are stepping in and doing too much for their teenagers, and they're not resilient enough. But it's very hard to get the right balance.

"Parents and teenagers need to understand that failure and making mistakes is part of life."

More than a third of parents (40%) questioned in the NCS survey admitted they've wrapped their teenager in cotton wool, possibly in an attempt to protect them from making mistakes and failure.

But Newton suggests that rather than stepping in to deal with situations teens get themselves into, parents should ask them what they want to do.

"I think we're not very good at trusting." she says.

"A lot of the things we hear about young people are so bad, and we're led to believe our teenagers are going to do something bad, yet all the evidence shows that's not true at all."

The NCS research showed that 52% of parents think their teenager is growing up too fast. However, Newton says evidence shows today's teens are having sex later, not drinking as much or taking as many drugs as previous generations.

"I don't think they are growing up any faster than in previous generations, it's just something we're led to believe," she says.

"Research shows that 70% of teenagers listen to their parents, and certainly with the teenagers I work with, it's actually more than that.

"Parents are hugely influential on their children. They're listening when you think they're not, and what we say and think is massively important to them, particularly when it comes to the opportunities they take."

:: National Citizen Service (NCS) is a once-in-a-lifetime, part-residential experience for 16 and 17-year-olds which takes place three times a year in school holidays. It includes a stay at an outdoor activity centre, workshops, skills challenges and creating a social action project that deals with a local issue teenagers are passionate about. For more information about NCS, visit www.ncsyes.co.uk

ASK THE EXPERT

Q: "What should I do if I suspect my baby has a fever?"

A: Dr Pixie McKenna, who's working with Nurofen for Children on their Confidence Collective initiative to help mums build confidence, says: "When dealing with a baby, try to get help from a third party, then one can cuddle while the other takes the temperature.

"Children under three months with a fever of 38 are deemed to be at risk of serious illness, and children aged between three to six months with a fever of 39 or greater are also deemed at risk. Irrespective of fever levels, any child who is pale or ashen, not responding to social cues, difficult to rouse, has difficulty breathing, is irritable and giving off a high-pitched or continuous cry or displays a non-blanching rash warrants urgent review.

"Any child with a fever ongoing for longer than five days also needs to see a doctor. As a rule, any child under three months with a temperature above 37.5 needs to be seen, irrespective of how they seem.

"You should ensure they're comfortable and not underdressed or over-wrapped. Aim to keep the room temperature comfortable at around 18 degrees. Offering the child regular fluids is important - in a breast-fed baby, breast milk is the most appropriate option. You should also continue to observe your child for signs of dehydration and deterioration of symptoms, even as they sleep overnight.

"We don't recommend treating fever if your child seems content and is taking fluids. If they're distressed by fever, my first port of call would be ibuprofen as it's pain killing and anti-inflammatory while also working against fever. You should never double dose with paracetamol but can alternate between ibuprofen and paracetamol if the child seems irritable between doses.

"Rushing in with medicine in a well child is ill-advised. Many parents falsely believe that dosing a child up with drugs will prevent a fever fit - it doesn't. What it does do is put your child at risk of overdose, so to prevent this, make a note of the dose and time drugs have been given."

NIGHT-TIME COMFORT

Russell the Dream Sheepdog

Russell helps toddlers sleep with his softly changing warm glow, which gently lights up the room with a calming blue and green colour therapy display. He also has a voice recorder, so parents can create personalised recordings of themselves talking, singing or even reading a bedtime story. Suitable from 18 months. £34.99, www.sweetdreamers.co.uk

Celeste & Moon Animal Cordless Nightlight

These animal night lights gently glow and change colour to offer comfort at night, glowing for up to 10 hours with no wires or batteries, and charging from a base which plugs into the mains. They will never get hot, so little ones can cuddle them in bed or pick them up if they need to get up in the night. Suitable from birth. £24.95, www.glow.co.uk

Indian Dohar Blanket

Each handmade Dohar comprises three layers of the finest cotton using the ancient art form of hand block printing, and can be used as a blanket, swaddle, cot sheet, nursing cloth or pram cover. The machine-washable blankets are available in five different animal designs. £39.99, www.mayakids.co.uk